Marissa Straw

  • May 2025 Music Recs

    Music recommendations while riding the waves

    Photographing Poison the Well, Glassjaw, Better Lovers, and Teenage Wrist in April lit something inside me. It was the music and musicians I loved and admired as a kid combined with meeting people who meet me and me them where we’re at.

    There are reminders that suffering is not the only way—and that what music releases is beautiful.

    The concert was at the end of the month, April 28, and in May I got lost in shows. Seven shows to be exact.

    (In between all of this I went to and photographed at Raleigh DIY Punk Rock Flea Market and Artsplosure.)

    Burnout had already begun in other areas of my life and without realizing it I had pushed myself further in May. So “it”—the further depths of perpetual global burnout due to the state of the world—reached this aspect of my life as well.

    And at this point, almost halfway through the year, I learned that my love of (post-)hardcore had cemented into being a theme of my (2025) Music Year.

    I had been on this journey, and April had been filled with a mixology of meaning in all directions artistically—intrinsically psychological and life changing, which of course is internal/eternal—that when May came, I wanted to ride that wavelength.

    seemingly strips down past vulnerability and goes straight to a pure self.

    And so I did. And I continued to learn. I learned more about my own voice. I have talked (and talked and talked) so much about speaking up, and still I held back for so long especially when it came to the people I let into my life—always the people who I shouldn’t give my time to, and yet…

    I know what it feels like to be at a point where there seems to be no way out from those who have hurt us the most.

    So I gave my time to what I love and am passionate about. I rode the waves. I cracked open. I let in experiences I never thought I would have and it was completely worth it.

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    May 2025 Music Recs

    Keep updated on recent Music Recs via my Instagram stories by following @marissastraw.

    Kayo Dot (and the music of Toby Driver) – Every Rock, Every Half-Truth Under Reason – “Oracle By Severed Head” (August 1, 2025)
    experimental avant-garde metal

    I am pretty excited for the new Kayo Dot / Toby Driver release. The single “Oracle By Severed Head” seemingly strips down past vulnerability and goes straight to a pure self. I can see a dance piece for this song, a movement within movement. Something classical and avant-garde.

    The rawness is not from being rubbed or scraped but from filtering through. Pure even when the message may not be because it is coming from yet another place. Inhuman and yet (again) pure—on another level—not quite emotion. I feel laid bare in listening. (Written 2025 May 10)

    Boru – SELF-DEALER – “Cosmic Blood” (September 11, 2024)
    atmospheric avant-garde post-metal

    I somehow missed this jolting record. SELF-DEALER is the second full-length by Boru and came out 2024 September 11. It is beautifully dark avant-garde post-metal.

    The opening is almost a duet with Départe. The constant rush to the heart…

    Is this why I have not made my top whatever number of 2024 albums? I jest and yet…

    This gorgeous shifting sand of sounds infiltrates all the spaces. I am beholden to it and am not burdened. (Written 2025 May 11)

    STOLEN GUN – DEMO 2025 – “eat the skull” (May 5, 2025)
    powerviolence grind/hardcore

    STOLEN GUN is powerviolence dialed in to post-apocalyptic present times. Short and not sweet. Transient and pertinent in the full soundscape that is grindcore. You can hear the history and movement forward.

    I love how more hard/grindcore bands have formed ‘supergroups.’ STOLEN GUN is made up of Vincent Bennett (The Acacia Strain), Brandon Albaugh (Thus Spoke Zarathustra), Duncan Newey (No Cure, Bleak, Emaciated), and Danny Grant (Pure Bliss). They remind me a little bit of GUILT DISPENSER what with their short songs and cutting sound. (Written 2025 May 12-July 2)

    A Pregnant Light – “01000100 01000101 01010110 01001111 01010101 01010010 01000101 01000100” (May 9, 2025)
    experimental post-metal punk

    I want to give some more love to Damian Master. This is the second single released this year under A Pregnant Light, the first was “Heart-Shaped Stain” in February.

    I connect with this project self-described “TOO MUCH TO DIE” on Bandcamp and single description of “i hope this hurts”. Though I do not wish ill will on anyone, I know what it feels like to be at a point where there seems to be no way out from those who have hurt us the most. That feeling of trapped and bled and turning on the self where you feel you deserve the pain even.

    To suffer is living. There are reminders that suffering is not the only way—and that what music releases is beautiful.

    Damian Master confirmed only in part the beauty piece in a dm—that the muse for this song is someone he loves.

    A Pregnant Light is post-hardcore, gothic, sad, “purple” metal. (Written 2025 May 15)

    May 2025 Music Recs Playlist

    2025 May Music Recs YouTube Playlist

    Kayo Dot (and the music of Toby Driver) – Every Rock, Every Half-Truth Under Reason – “Oracle By Severed Head”
    Boru – SELF-DEALER – “Cosmic Blood”
    STOLEN GUN – DEMO 2025 – “eat the skull”
    A Pregnant Light – “01000100 01000101 01010110 01001111 01010101 01010010 01000101 01000100“

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  • April 2025 Music Recs

    Music recommendations from a louder place

    It is easier to see the almost palinopsia-like events—of course, almost all self-imposing—while writing about April from the place I am in June. March began the concerts, and April began the travels and protests.

    Colorado, 2025 April 15 – copyright Marissa Straw

    I adopted a new cat in February and was a bit wary of leaving him without humans for the first time—though he and my other cat have wonderful cat sitters. He is so hyper and vocally happy; a contrast to my girlies who were/are normally shy and quiet. I think he inspired the balled-up energy to explode OUT.

    That March surface sadness that sunk below found strength in the depths of April. I found warmth in Colorado. I connected and reconnected with friends and loved ones. We hiked and climbed; ate wonderful food. I was able to kind of visit the past summers I spent there without repaving, I walked in new places.

    Cinematic and “feel good” while also holding onto some sad harshness.

    Forward Together March, Raleigh, NC, 2025 April 19 – copyright Marissa Straw

    I found similar connections at a protest in Raleigh with my mother and others attending. And then again with my sister in New York and at Brooklyn Paramount for Poison the Well, Glassjaw, Better Lovers, and Teenage Wrist with staff, concertgoers, and some musicians. I came home with lots of photos, Death and the Twilight Hours by Predatory Light on vinyl from Captured Record Shop, and a “new” favorite hot drink: masala chai/coffee from several restaurants in Brooklyn.

    I also came home from New York with a better understanding of my place in speaking out on trauma due to an incident that happened at the concert because it was dealt with in a healing way.

    April as a music month felt very loud and deep. I found my place in multiple spaces. I felt ‘at home’ often—when I hardly ever feel at home in homes. It was a gift of the present.

    …how existential, how absurdist, how gorgeously goofy.

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    April 2025 Music Recs

    Keep updated on recent Music Recs via my Instagram stories by following @marissastraw.

    Autumn’s Dawn – We Lost Our Hope Along The Way – “Ever Fading Light” (March 28, 2025)
    avant-garde post-black metal/rock

    Listening to the new Autumn’s Dawn feels like I am half in The Crow and half in a modern Larry Clark/Harmony Korine or Gregg Araki film, with a touch of Donnie Darko in the background.

    We Lost Our Hope Along The Way is brilliantly done post-black metal, post-new-wave rock. It is interesting to hear this mix. It is not one I hear often, usually it goes overly atmospheric (and nothing wrong with that). This sound is a whole other vibe and so well done. Cinematic and “feel good” while also holding onto some sad harshness. (Written written 2025 April 03)

    Florida Man – Plastique – “2017” (April 4, 2025)
    noise punk post-hardcore

    Florida Man, you is goofy AF.

    If you have not noticed yet…with music I go off vibes. Many people are vibes listeners.

    With Florida Man the vibes I get are surfer rock in the vein of Link Wray. And how can you not bring up Rage Against the Machine or Faith No More with these guys, so much influence—I also hear some Brainiac.

    Florida Man are goofy harder-core. They are like if IDLES did post-hardcore. They are like if IDLES did post-hardcore and are also gen z, young millenial? I’m not really sure how old Florida Man is—they are supposed to be ageless. All I know is they are so fun and they have got these warbly mermaid moments throughout. Oh and look, Plastique ends mid song (in medias res)…how existential, how absurdist, how gorgeously goofy. (Written 2025 April 10)

    Snooze – I KNOW HOW YOU WILL DIE – “I Listened” (April 4, 2025)
    post-hardcore progressive math metal

    The first person I sent this album to was Jesse. I sometimes have people in mind when listening. And there’s this beautiful proggy, just ethereal quality with I KNOW HOW YOU WILL DIE. It is like a flow state. I know that is the kind of music Jesse loves.

    Progressive music is not something that I connected with as much until I met him. And I feel like this band has a combination that I bring as well, a post-hardcore dark beauty…I mean look at the album cover and title.

    Snooze go to such extremes in their transitions between genres in a way that many post-hardcore/math bands do and yet are more fluid than most any band I have heard.

    Snooze seamlessly unites these worlds of prog and post. (written 2025 April 15)

    June update: Snooze is a favorite and I have listened to them hundreds of times at this point.

    Aortes – Carrion – “When We Cease” (April 20, 2025)
    sludgey post-hardcore metal

    Carrion by Aortes is yet another album that I have been slowly chewing on. There is cascading sounds, slow dissonance, mixed with hardcore. A lot of love here. I have been slowly working through it and with as little good sleep as possible that I have been getting this is a good glue.

    The album feels a lot like tempered anger. Oppressive yet filtering through. A mesh sieve, at times controlled and all falling through. Though what really is shining is heartbreak, grief, love—”love” is repeated in the lyrics throughout.

    They are sludgey, heartbreak post-hardcore. (Written 2025 April 25)

    DWM (Die with Me) – Psalms Unspoken – “mourning//adaptation” (February 14, 2025)
    post-hard/metal core

    In their most melodic moments Die with Me (DWM) is reminiscent of Finch and I do not know why fully or for how long I have been waiting for that feeling, but I have been—it has been waiting for me in my carefully placed player on the off-white carpet of my middle school bedroom, pressing play.

    They are harsher, and there are definitely touches of From Autumn to Ashes, but the beauty veers Finch.

    (I wrote this up the first week of April and it seems fitting that I share them after a different euphoric post-hardcore show I had the opportunity to photograph.) (Written 2025 Apr 30)

    April 2025 Playlist

    2025 April Music Recs YouTube Playlist

    Autumn’s Dawn – We Lost Our Hope Along The Way – “Ever Fading Light”
    Florida Man – Plastique – “2017”
    Snooze – I KNOW HOW YOU WILL DIE – “I Listened”
    Aortes – Carrion – “When We Cease”
    DWM (Die with Me) – Psalms Unspoken – “mourning//adaptation”

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  • March 2025 Music Recs

    Music recommendations while sadness falls from the surface

    March is my birthday month and I most definitely live up to my emotional Piscean stereotype—if you had not yet gathered from my writing thus far.

    There is almost a sultry, humid sadness.

    For musical appreciation though, Cafe Astrology states that my sextile between the Sun and Neptune means that “there is an unmistakably dreamy, inspired, and sensitive side” to me and “a marked appreciation for music and the arts.” I am a dabbler in mystical/spiritual things, though I am not knowledgeable nor a fanatic—but I will not make fun of it.

    What I know is that I enjoy sifting through music like sand and shark teeth. I have utter fascination with the restorative nature of finding and sharing treasures.

    …pushing through the madness of life, and seeing all that grows within it.

    March was the month I was able to be outwardly creative again—more sharing. It had been 3 months since I did concert photos and I started with noisy punk-rock-indie-hardcore beauts American Motors and Pretty Baby at The Pinhook in Durham. (Two group photos of the bands at the end.) This music month I was connecting more to post-hardcore, the cycle was spiraling outward.

    The revitalization and idea of a new start was coming to fruition. The deep sadness was not necessarily lessening, only falling from the surface—perhaps it is the same.

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    March 2025 Music Recs

    Keep updated on recent Music Recs via my Instagram stories by following @marissastraw.

    PARIAH – Violence Is A Curse – “Endless Circles” (February 28, 2025)
    extreme grindcore sludge post-metal

    PARIAH’s music comes in like a heavy fog from post-metal sludge to visceral hardcore. It is completely tapped into the pit—”Endless Circles” allowing for endless circles. It embodies bloody good dancing and has ‘light the fire,’ emboldening kind of energy. (Written 2025 March 2)

    Downward – Downward – “Darkscreen” (March 5, 2025)
    emo post-hardcore indie

    Downward‘s second album, self-titled, is the first I have heard by them. It is reminiscent of what I would have explored in my teen years off StumbleUpon or Deadjournal.

    There is almost a sultry, humid sadness. Downward permeates like emo bedroom ballads exploring outside through squinted eyes. They tether shoegaze and soft emo whilst pulling on the strings of whimsical post-hardcore influence. Downward is beautiful heavy motes of light in darkness. (Written 2025 March 5)

    Guiltless – Teeth To Sky – “Into Dust Becoming” (March 7, 2025)
    updated shiny classic atmospheric sludge slow hardcore metal

    I normally try to share bands that not everyone is talking about, mostly because that has literally always been the kind of music that I listened to. And “everyone” is relative. But, so why not? I love digging through the music on my own…and yet sharing is the important bit.

    I heard about Guiltless through various other people and bands. And they definitely fucking live up to the hype—not that that matters.

    They are like…all that shines with classic atmospheric sludge metal and then this updated version of that, a slow hardcore. Is that a thing—updated shiny classic atmospheric sludge slow hardcore metal? I’ll just call it a thing, we come up with genres or mash ’em together all the time and that is precisely the way it is with the genre pool. The sound of why sludge has its name…pushing through the madness of life, and seeing all that grows within it. (Written 2025 March 9-16)

    ASHEN HANDS – Ashen Hands – “If i am going to die, i want to die here in Manhattan” (March 14, 2025)
    punk grind-hardcore emoviolence

    ASHEN HANDS has that mesmerizing desperation that comes with post-hardcore. They lean less melodic, more chaotic and violent with emo tinges. Their songs off debut self-titled EP sound cyclical in spirals—covering subject and sound without repetition, heavy without being oppressive. (Written 2025 March 17)

    Awfully Pretty – A Spot Between – “whatever happened to Tony Bennet” (March 28, 2025)
    metallic mathgrind emoviolence

    Everyone’s music journey is different. I went from nu-metal – grunge – hardcore (punk) – sludge – black metal – post-metal, picking up everything along the way. My stint in screamo-esq anything was (awfully) short as a preteen and now some 20 years later I have gotten back into it due to the melding and beauty of post-hardcore/math-grindcore.

    Awfully Pretty seems pretty young themselves. Any screamo-tinted music has this longing and angst to it, not quite amber-frozen though stuck just the same. The flow between poppy, screamo, grindcore, basement punk rock is effortless and—not cool—on edge.

    My favorite bits off their album are when those overlapping effortless pieces slide together, shining light on the raw vulnerabilities—why “we” make and listen to music to describe them. (Written 2025 March 31)

    March 2025 Playlist

    2025 March Music Recs YouTube Playlist

    PARIAH – Violence Is A Curse – “Endless Circles”
    Downward – Downward – “Darkscreen”
    Guiltless – Teeth To Sky – “Into Dust Becoming”
    ASHEN HANDS – Ashen Hands – “If i am going to die, i want to die here in Manhattan”
    Awfully Pretty – A Spot Between – “whatever happened to Tony Bennet”

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  • February 2025 Music Recs

    Metal recommendations meeting the darkness face first falling

    While January may have been a moment of quickened change, a high on catharsis, with utter focus on the beauty in darkness, February was meeting the darkness face first falling. The music slowed down in quantity—luckily never quality—and brought to mind more reminiscent favorites than the former month.

    I feel like I refer to my favorite cult bands (Cult of Luna and Cult Leader) often enough on here that people notice…

    Just as it can be a comfort to rewatch a television show, it can be helpful to relisten to music that one has heard before. Only I have this condition where I still cannot help but find new music and so I—without realizing it—went to those that reminded me of the big ones from childhood. And my childhood discoveries started with nu-metal, grunge, and hardcore punk which transitioned into post-hardcore and sludge and so on. But first there were my familial influences of musicals, classical music, and jazz.

    It helped take me out of my dissociative revelry with its wonderfully disjointed, playful sound.

    And so this was nostalgia without the longing for actual childhood; connecting to that sadness as an adult who can understand it better and delve into play in a way I could not before.

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    February Music Recs

    Keep updated on recent Music Recs via my Instagram stories by following @marissastraw.

    Cross Bringer – Healismus Aeternus – “Desolation Hypnosis” (February 21, 2025)
    hardcore black metal crust

    This is the kind of music that tears at that broken cavern inside my chest. It further rips away at all the stone with utter chaos and bypasses everything that is held down but does not belong.

    Chaotic, melodic, dark, and cathartic. A perfect elixir of blackened post-hardcore. Healismus Aeternus is the second album by Cross Bringer after 5 years. (Written 2025 February 3)

    Grey Aura – Zwart vierkant: Slotstuk – “Opgehangen afgrond” (March 28, 2025)
    avant-garde black metal noise

    Grey Aura‘s single “Opgehangen afgrond” had me going to their first album right away because I was drawn in so quick. I love how fun, jazzy punk their music gets. I have listened to their newest song and last album on repeat this week. It helped take me out of my dissociative revelry with its wonderfully disjointed, playful sound. Truly excited to hear the rest of their newest album, Zwart vierkant: Slotstuk. They are avant-garde black metal noise. (Written 2025 February 9)

    Noctambulist – Noctambulist II: De Droom – “Lang Leve de Droom” (February 7, 2025)
    post-hardcore melodic black metal gaze wave

    Post-hardcore melodic black metal, shoegaze, new wave, and more. Noctambulist is definitely on my radar now after finding their newest album which was released February 7. I love the gaze/wave elements they combine for this album that makes for heartfelt reflections. (Written 2025 February 9)

    Wells Valley – Achamoth – “Intercession And Invocation” (September 29, 2023)
    atmospheric avant-garde blackened post-metal

    I only discovered Wells Valley a few days ago when I stumbled upon their 10th anniversary album of their debut Matter As Regent. This is the first time in a long time that I have listened to a band’s music in chronological order.

    I love hearing all the influence of music from bands like Neurosis, and even Ulcerate or Cult of Luna at times. Wells Valley leans more avant-garde and are very atmospheric sludge/doom post-metal. Other than the anniversary edition of their debut, their most recent release is Achamoth (2023) which brings out the sirens and sludge more so than their first two albums. I am looking forward to hearing more from them. (Written 2025 February 14)

    Last Forest Rain – Last Forest Rain -“Silver Bridge Sunset” (January 17, 2025)
    post-hardcore/black metal/gaze

    Last Forest Rain is a new favorite. I could tell they were a favorite 30 seconds in. Their debut self-titled LP came out in January and is full of post-, -gaze love. They have so many influences across genres, at times it seems even that small space where post-hardcore punk meets sludge slips in. Last Forest Rain are mainly a combination of post-hardcore, post-black metal, and -gaze. (Written 2025 February 19)

    K L P S (KOLLAPS\E) – K L P S – “UNDERTOW” (March 7, 2025)
    post-hardcore sludge metal

    I feel like I refer to my favorite cult bands (Cult of Luna and Cult Leader) often enough on here that people notice…but it is because I really love them and they are prime examples of what I enjoy most.

    K L P S sounds a lot like Cult of Luna and Cult Leader in the sense that their music sounds like a frozen river, singing and streaming through broken ice…or glass. Each moment a submersion and reversion.

    Some of my favorite parts of these two songs are the transitions. Something I have found myself looking for in post-hardcore/sludge bands is the melodic piece and connectors, and they have this down beautifully. (Written 2025 February 25)

    February 2025 Playlist

    2025 February Music Recs YouTube Playlist

    Cross Bringer – Healismus Aeternus – “Desolation Hypnosis”
    Grey Aura – Zwart vierkant: Slotstuk – “Opgehangen afgrond”
    Noctambulist – Noctambulist II: De Droom – “Lang Leve de Droom”
    Wells Valley – Achamoth – “Intercession And Invocation”
    Last Forest Rain – Last Forest Rain -“Silver Bridge Sunset”
    K L P S (KOLLAPS\E) – K L P S – “UNDERTOW”

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  • January 2025 Music Recs

    Metal recommendations from a broken heart

    January was the month that encapsulated hope. I was that kid who did not think that I would live into my 30s.

    Poppy, jazzy, cathartic metal that met me in the depths of my broken heart. In the month after my elderly cat died, who stayed by my side since I was 20, I was in liminal spaces…something I was used to, having been dissociative most of my life. Yet this was a meeting with something more ghostly and spiritual. Connecting with pieces of curiosity. Delving into something that I thought I closed.

    I was not sure connecting with music would be the same…but that’s the funny thing, it never is “the same.” My heart broke in a way I did not think I would survive. And music was no healer this time. It embodied the connector.

    January was the month that encapsulated hope. I was that kid who did not think that I would live into my 30s. Who thought that once my cat was gone that I would be too. This music month was about the gray beauty that is life.

    I felt like the drums were pebbles hitting the window of my chest until I finally teared up during “Hela’s Choir”

    January Music Recs

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    CROWN OF MADNESS – Memories Fragmented – “Dreamless Nights No Longer” (February 28, 2025)
    dissonant atmospheric black death metal

    I will talk about why I haven’t shared as much lately soon, for now I’m glad to be sharing at all. CROWN OF MADNESS has two singles out for their 2025 February 28 album Memories Fragmented, their first LP. I appreciate how heavy and emotional their album is. It breaks my heart all over again just in listening. Every instrument cuts deep and touches on so much pain and love. This duo definitely has a place amongst bands like Ulcerate, Gorguts, and more. Gorgeous post-black-death progressive metal. (Written 2025 January 2)

    Wolvencrown – Celestial Lands – “Until the End” (November 29, 2024)
    extreme atmospheric melodic black metal

    At times haunting melody, this atmospheric black metal band Wolvencrown has put out a powerful record. I missed Celestial Lands when it came out 2024 November 25 last year. Perfect for those interested in an updated classic take of the black metal genre. Perfect for times when there are no good answers and we must bear witness to the cycle of life. (Written 2025 January 3)

    The Body – The Crying Out of Things – “All Worries” (November 8, 2024)
    experimental industrial black punk noise

    The whole album, The Crying Out of Things, feels like standing in the hallway between a noise-rave party and home. The Body is known for dis-comfort, and yet I find comfort here. I’ve listened to them for years and this album has spoken to me the most. It is also another last year album that I didn’t fully listen to until now. For sure, gorgeously done maximalist noise. (Written 2025 January 4)

    GUILT DISPENSER – DETONATION – “dust” (January 1, 2025)
    punk metal powerviolence

    GUILT DISPENSER, more like emotional releaser with album DETONATION coming out on 2025 January 01. With one word tracks adding up to less than 10 minutes?? all packing a huge punch of powerviolence/grind/math/hardcore. Definitely the way to start the new year, with armor. (Written 2025 January 5)

    Gonemage – Entranced by the Ice Storm – “Giga Axe Beam” (January 3, 2025)
    extreme experimental chiptune metal

    Seriously happy about these two songs, the fact that it’s the first music that made me smile while grieving says so much about Garry Brents’ work. I feel like I held off on writing about his new teaser EP because I’m still getting back into the groove of things and I think so highly of him.

    I truly love this teaser. “Giga Axe Beam” especially makes me smile. It’s like nu-metal Nightmare Before Christmas wrapped up in a song. Continually impressed by how Brents combines so many influences with beautiful nuisance. (Written 2025 January 6)

    Laudare – Requiem – “Quarens Me” (October 11, 2024)
    progressive post-black metal hardcore

    Laudare does some of the opposite of what some my favorites do…they lull you into a calm with clean vocals and chamber-like music, and then pierce you with harsh vocals and heavy beats of post-black metal hardcore prog. For fans of Gaerea and White Ward. Requiem released 2024 October 11. (Written 2025 January 9)

    Prostitute – Attempted Martyr – “Body Meat” (October 20, 2024)
    alternative post-punk hardcore dance noise

    I’m so glad that a friend suggested Attempted Martyr by Prostitute. He described them as a kind of mix between Protomartyr and The Body. I agree and would say they’re like an avant-garde IDLES.

    I love how psychedelic sounding “M. Dada” is and there are more psychedelic, punk-like elements in the rest of the album as well. “In the Corner Dunce” is the most chill, yet still ‘aggressive’ song on the album in a Chat Pile way. “Body Meat” is the most Haunted Horses for me. Thank you for this—post-punk, hardcore, dance noise—madness. (Written 2025 January 9)

    Fórn – Repercussions of the Self – “Hela’s Choir” (October 18, 2024)
    industrial melodic doom sludge metal

    I was super dissociative for two days when a friend got me to finally listen to Fórn’s Repercussions of the Self (released 2024 October 18). I felt like the drums were pebbles hitting the window of my chest until I finally teared up during “Hela’s Choir,” which makes complete sense due to the meaning behind Hela. The well-done oppressive fog unveils a beautiful desert night. It reminds me of looking up at the stars when I was in the middle east. Listening to the birds. It’s difficult for me to compare them to other post-doom sludge bands out there right now. There’s something cinematic in what they capture. (Written January 10)

    Besna – Krásno – “Hranice” (January 16, 2025)
    progressive blackened post-metal

    Although self-described as black metal, which they very much still are, Besna falls to the post- side of it. Including lots of proggy post-rock/core in their songs off Krásno (2025 January 16). One of the most uplifting sounding post-black metal bands I’ve heard…even more so than their previous work as well. Parts remind me of A Secret Revealed, which is lovely. Their songs feel so beautifully light, like soaring through the sky. (Written 2025 January 10)

    Pale – Our Hearts In Your Heaven – “Almost Transparent Blue” (January 10, 2025)
    atmospheric post-black metal rock gaze

    Pale’s first LP was a very nice surprise. The snippet of song I shared on my Instagram stories is from the song “Almost Transparent Blue” which is in the middle of seven songs off Our Hearts In Your Heaven. It’s the most hopeful sounding of songs from Pale’s album. They mostly use harsh vocals (and still do in this song) and incorporate lots of post-rock noise, classic rock/metal into their post-black metal/gaze sound. The whole album vibrates with emotion. Lots of rawness to an already harsh edge. (Written 2025 January 13)

    CKRAFT – Uncommon Grounds – “Steadfast (In the Face of Tribulations)” (January 17, 2025)
    progressive jazz metal

    I have been listening to CKRAFT’s new album Uncommon Grounds every day since it came out on 2025 January 17. I feel like I’m back in my dad’s old car listening to jazz on public radio or wandering into his study. A silly part of me also feels like I’m watching court introductions from Robin Hood: Men In Tights. Overall their progressive jazz metal combination is impressive, fun, and lovely. #NotMyFather’sJazzBand #GottaIntroduceThisToMyDadThough (Written 2025 January 23)

    Scowl – We Are All Angels – “Not Hell, Not Heaven” (April 4, 2025)
    poppy hardcore punk

    Scowl’s upcoming album We Are All Angels (2025 April 4), it is seemingly very syrupy based off their two singles. I love the sound they have developed: hardcore punk roots incorporating sweet grunge rock. Of the two singles, “Not Hell, Not Heaven” is the poppy-ier one which instills the meaning of the song further.

    “Like the oceans, like the sea / I’m possessed, you’ll drown in me” “Just lie in the bed that you made / Let truth burn holes in the sheet / Set fire and set you free / Swallow you like it did me” “The way it’s eating me alive, oh / The guilt will swallow you up / Sage, it’s lilac, it’s bloody, it’s bruising/ And my, my voice”

    (These lyrics deserve applause.) (Written 2025 January 24)

    VIDER – STRIKE WITH PUTREFACTION – “MASSACRE” (January 31, 2025)
    blackened death-metal grindcore

    VIDER’s debut has the brutality of Antichrist Siege Machine and Mitochondrion. They are black-death metal with some grindcore and war metal—whatever catharsis mix this is, I need it.

    Urgent. Savage. Hypnotic. (Written 2025 January 26)

    Сивый Яр / Sivyj Yar – Над страшной пропастью рдяный восход / A Scarlet Sunset over the Horrid Abyss – “Всё под снегами утихнет, умрёт / Everything Under the Snow Will Hush, Then Die” (February 28, 2025)
    avant-garde black doom metal

    I’m looking forward to this new album by Sivyji Yar, coming out in February. During my listen I was reminded of a sunset before even seeing the title of the album, A Scarlet Sunset over the Horrid Abyss. A hopeful listen on such serious topics. Beautiful, poetic post-black metal. (Written 2025 January 28)

    Hanging Garden – The Unending -“The First Sunrise” (March 14, 2025)
    gothic death doom metal

    Hanging Garden makes beautiful melodic metal filled with heartfelt duets. Their new EP The Unending (2025 March 14) has single “The First Sunrise” out now which is such a clear and refreshing song. Their gothic vibes are not dissimilar to Dax Riggs’ solo work with sound falling toward Leprous even at times and are compared to Paradise Lost, Depeche Mode, and more. (Written 2025 January 30)

    consider donating / sending a ☕

    January 2025 Playlist

    2025 January Music Recs YouTube Playlist

    CROWN OF MADNESS – Memories Fragmented – “Dreamless Nights No Longer”
    Wolvencrown – Celestial Lands – “Until the End”
    The Body – The Crying Out of Things – “All Worries”
    GUILT DISPENSER – DETONATION – “dust” (missing from YouTube)
    Gonemage – Entranced by the Ice Storm – “Giga Axe Beam”
    Laudare – Requiem – “Quarens Me”
    Prostitute – Attempted Martyr – “Body Meat”
    Fórn – Repercussions of the Self – “Hela’s Choir”
    Besna – Krásno – “Hranice”
    Pale – Our Hearts In Your Heaven – “Almost Transparent Blue”
    CKRAFT – Uncommon Grounds – “Steadfast (In the Face of Tribulations)”
    Scowl – We Are All Angels – “Not Hell, Not Heaven”
    VIDER – STRIKE WITH PUTREFACTION – “MASSACRE”
    Сивый Яр / Sivyj Yar – Над страшной пропастью рдяный восход / A Scarlet Sunset over the Horrid Abyss – “Всё под снегами утихнет, умрёт / Everything Under the Snow Will Hush, Then Die”
    Hanging Garden – The Unending -“The First Sunrise”

    If you enjoyed getting these music recs…

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  • Napalm Death, Melvins, & Weedeater @ Cat’s Cradle, Carrboro – May 2nd 2025

    a bit of an ode to Cat’s Cradle in live review

    I went out on a whim to the sold-out show, teetering on the bridge of “…or should I go” mere hours before. Not even two days back from Brooklyn, and there I was driving a long way down I-40 in my sticky-pollen-covered car to reach the third venue I ever photographed at in 2007, at the “edge of seventeen”. 

    A black and white image of a live concert with a vocalist performing energetically in front of a cheering crowd. The audience is engaged, with hands raised and a crowd surfer being supported by the fans.
    Napalm Death © Marissa Straw

    Although Cat’s Cradle has moved a few locations since its opening in 1969, it has barely changed in the almost 20 years since the first show I photographed there. The most memorable change is that the sound stage is centered and farther back from where it was in the early 2000s. Obviously, not much needs to change—Napalm Death, Melvins, and Weedeater regularly come back to the venue, each seems to get grittier and better every time. 

    This was my third time seeing Melvins, second time seeing Weedeater, and first time seeing Napalm Death. Sadly, I still have not seen Dark Sky Burial—Shane Embury was unwell (get well soon!)—bassist Mats filled in for him and has been covering a few shows.

    Napalm Death © Marissa Straw

    I feel fortunate that the shows I have attended in my thirties have been the best of my life. After each one, I walk away feeling inspired and thinking, “I am so glad I went.” This was the most energetic yet respectful punk-metal show I have ever attended—the perfect balance between chaos and care. Sure, there were some poorly executed crowd surfs among the many well-executed ones—one of which almost landed on me—but overall, the vibe was playful and full of banter. A bit surprising how everyone kept their cool on such a brutally humid night—more than half the pit was drenched in sweat from all the movement. That cool-headed energy was largely thanks to the polished mayhem delivered by the veteran bands.

    Weedeater © Marissa Straw
    Melvins © Marissa Straw

    It was the kind of show where I wished I did videography, as I wanted to capture every single moment—especially what Mark ‘Barney’ Greenway had to say on stage about Trump, the economy, and overall sociopolitics. “Nazi Punks Fuck Off” cover truly is *the* theme. Barney’s repartee with the crowd deserves scholarly attention, as does the polite calmness to all the shouted song requests, “All I can say is that it’s coming.” Additional notables were that Dave “Dixie” Collins kept the crowd entertained with his trademark witty quips, two drummers (Dale Crover and Coady Willis) played the entire Melvins set, and Barney, Buzz Osborne, and Steven Shane McDonald seemed to run laps across the stage.

    Melvins © Marissa Straw

    A rare night where the majority of the bands (two out of three) have been around for longer than I have been alive. The crowd was filled with people of all ages and tastes—personal favorites of mine were Brainiac and Boris shirts, with a scattering of bands like Gojira, Eyehategod, Exhumed, and of course the bands playing. 

    Thank you to all the protective people—so many of whom were not men—you didn’t have to look out for me, but you did, and I salute you. A belated “you’re beautiful” to the one person who told me I’m pretty while I was in the photo pit—I was speechless. Extra thanks to the two photographers I befriended and chatted with; the mutual respect was real, and I love our shared energy. Extra extra thanks to the few security guards who listened and knew their stuff (you know who you are), and to the staff who gave me extra water and took the phone I found in the restroom. What a beautiful night. Sweaty, energetic movement cooled by the rain and a brisk walk back to the car, washing off all the stick—washing off all the stick.

    More images to come and will be posted on Instagram.

    Melvins © Marissa Straw
    Napalm Death © Marissa Straw
    © Marissa Straw

  • On Writing a Trauma-Informed Care Proposal for Libraries

    Disclaimer: The views, opinions, advice, and perspectives shared here are my own and should not be considered the views nor official recommendations of my employer.

    In 2023, at work, I was on my knees restocking books at the self-checkout display cube on the second floor. While pulling books off a baby cart (aka a single-bank rolling cart) and shelving them onto the display, a middle-aged white man pretended to fall behind me and his hand “landed” on my left butt cheek. He did a full hand grab of my cheek and then un-pocketed my phone from my back jean pocket. I felt the grab and subsequent loss of my phone and stood at once.

    As I watched his hand, my phone still in it, the man began to turn. I felt the delay in my thoughts becoming words and thus articulation as well. I snatched my phone from his hand and then, belatedly—and loudly—stated, “Don’t touch me.” I stepped back and again, watched his now empty hand as he turned then walked toward the computers across the way.

    Once the man sat down, I rushed downstairs to the security guard station at the front of the library entrance and gave the guard a quick overview. The guard1 then rushed back upstairs with me. Some of my coworkers noticed us coming and began to ask questions; without looking up, I mentioned I was going into our Adult Services Workroom. In the workroom I took a seat at the back computer staring at my blank phone when a coworker asked if I wanted her to stay with me. Then she asked if I wanted to report this to the police and encouraged me to do what I felt comfortable to do.

    I ended up calling the police. The officer did not take long to get there. I did not move from my seat. My coworker sat with me the whole time as the officer spoke with me. Apparently there was a witness, a library patron, to the entire event. I could not remember the color of the man’s shirt, my coworker did.

    The officer asked if I could get information about the man off our library software. The answer is no. A court order is needed to provide information on library patrons without their consent.

    All of these incidents add up, especially onto a life where trauma is a familiar foe.

    In the next few days, the man returned to our library branch, the library system trespassed him and a police officer arrested him. I sat with my two supervisors separately and I spoke on retraumatization and on how there are no procedures in place to deal with the aftermath of situations like these for staff members other than incident reports for security guards and an informal referral to county-funded counseling. To one supervisor I intellectualized my trauma. I mentioned how I am able to “more easily” navigate and endure this type of trauma because I have already endured similar situations and thus know what is needed to help prevent the trauma from getting worse—which means that I must be “okay.” A month later I sat in court next to my mother who held and squeezed my hand as the man received a temporary restraining order and probation.

    This is not my first time being groped or sexually assaulted without consent. This is not the first time I have been harassed or violated while at work, whether by a patron, coworker, or supervisor. From boys and men asking me to smile at a library desk to a former male coworker asking me for sexually explicit details about my life to being yelled at by a former female supervisor, and countless other incidents deemed “worse” or “not so bad.”

    All of these incidents add up, especially onto a life where trauma is a familiar foe. Even if there was only one incident, there still is a need for a response—better yet, a preemptive one. And so I got to work. I began writing out a proposal to counteract all these seemingly small events that fester in our systems. I did the research into the effects of and the relationship with trauma in libraries; on trauma and secondary trauma that staff experience as well as patron trauma. And I wrote a proposal for my library system on better ways to provide and receive care.

    By not making actionable change we further divide our communities, isolating groups and individuals.

    The proposal provides an overview of procedures that the library system already used involving trauma-informed care, along with outlining gaps, resources, research, and potential trainings, with next steps for the library system to make. The purpose is to incorporate trauma-informed care in the foundation with core values and mission. This involves staff members, patrons, administration, and community. So not only does it cover a pathway forward for issues that affect staff, it also provides a pathway to better care for library patrons, especially those experiencing trauma. Libraries are considered a safe haven for many patrons and are considered one of the last free vestiges in our society and now come with an enhanced role where handing out Narcan and having social workers on call is commonplace.

    Since writing and sending off my proposal I joined two library committees, first the Policy Committee and second the Professional Development Committee. Input from myself and other staff members was utilized on procedures that were already on library administration’s radar. I believe “It is vital to have active input from people who have experienced trauma in the organizational change toward trauma-informed care.” In addition, library administration has since put procedures in place for critical incidents.

    Although not perfect, change surrounding trauma-informed care in my library system has been made for the better. It is important for our voices to not only be heard, but actively listened to and followed up by actionable change. By not making actionable change we further divide our communities, isolating groups and individuals. With actionable change we foster empowerment, connection, and a sense of belonging that will hopefully provide agency.

    Trauma-Informed Care Framework Proposal (shared with permission): The advice and perspectives shared are my own and should not be considered official views and recommendations of my employer.

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    Library security guards are unarmed.

  • 2025.02 February Music Recs

    written 2025 Feb 25

    K L P S (KOLLAPS\E)

    K L P S

    “UNDERTOW”

    I feel like I refer to my favorite cult bands (Cult of Luna and Cult Leader) often enough on here that people notice…but it is because I really love them and they are prime examples of what I enjoy most.

    K L P S sounds a lot like Cult of Luna and Cult Leader in the sense that their music sounds like a frozen river, singing and streaming through broken ice…or glass. Each moment a submersion and reversion.

    Some of my favorite parts of these two songs are the transitions. Something I have found myself looking for in post-hardcore/sludge bands is the melodic piece and connectors, and they have this down beautifully.

    K L P S’s second full length releases 2025 March 7 and has two singles currently streaming.

    written 2025 Feb 19

    Last Forest Rain

    Last Forest Rain

    “Silver Bridge Sunset”

    Last Forest Rain is a new favorite. I could tell they were a favorite 30 seconds in. Their debut self-titled LP came out in January and is full of post-, -gaze love. They have so many influences across genres, at times it seems even that small space where post-hardcore punk meets sludge slips in. Last Forest Rain are mainly a combination of post-hardcore, post-black metal, and -gaze.

    written 2025 Feb 14

    Wells Valley

    Achamoth

    “Intercession And Invocation”

    I only discovered Wells Valley a few days ago when I stumbled upon their 10th anniversary album of their debut Matter As Regent. This is the first time in a long time that I have listened to a band’s music in chronological order.

    I love hearing all the influence of music from bands like Neurosis, and even Ulcerate or Cult of Luna at times. Wells Valley leans more avant-garde and are very atmospheric sludge/doom post-metal. Other than the anniversary edition of their debut, their most recent release is Achamoth (2023) which brings out the sirens and sludge more so than their first two albums. I am looking forward to hearing more from them.

    written 2025 Feb 09

    Noctambulist

    Noctambulist II: De Droom

    “Lang Leve de Droom”

    Post-hardcore melodic black metal, shoegaze, new wave, and more. Noctambulist is definitely on my radar now after finding their newest album which was released February 7. I love the gaze/wave elements they combine for this album that makes for heartfelt reflections.

    written 2025 Feb 09

    Grey Aura

    Zwart vierkant: Slotstuk

    “Opgehangen afgrond”

    Grey Aura‘s single “Opgehangen afgrond” had me going to their first album right away because I was drawn in so quick. I love how fun, jazzy punk their music gets. I have listened to their newest song and last album on repeat this week. It has helped take me out of my dissociative revelry with its wonderfully disjointed, playful sound. Truly excited to hear the rest of their newest album, Zwart vierkant: Slotstuk. They are avant-garde black metal noise.

    written 2025 Feb 03

    Cross Bringer

    Healismus Aeternus

    “Desolation Hypnosis”

    This is the kind of music that tears at that broken cavern inside my chest. It further rips away at all the stone with utter chaos and bypasses everything that is held down but does not belong.

    Chaotic, melodic, dark, and cathartic. A perfect elixir of blackened post-hardcore. Healismus Aeternus is the second album by Cross Bringer after 5 years. Release is 2025 February 21.

    If you enjoyed these recs, consider donating or buying me a ☕

  • 2024.12 December Music Recs

    written 2024 Dec 28

    samlrc

    A Lonely Sinner

    “Storge”

    Feeling numb at the moment, so let’s gaze. samlrc released A Lonely Sinner 2024 March 08. I put off listening to this experimental post-metal, shoegaze, folk beauty…sometimes things come when you need them. The ‘everyday expression’ mentioned as a theme in this album is very much felt.

    An intimate work of art. Seeking connection…through samples, through multiple instrumentation, through the space used in creating it…

    written 2024 Dec 27

    Full of Hell and Andrew Nolan

    Scraping The Divine

    “Sphere of Saturn (feat. Justin Broadrick)”

    I listened to Scraping The Divine (2024 November 15) before Full of Hell‘s LP Coagulated Bliss that came out earlier this year. I typically go newest first with bands and even though Coagulated Bliss was on my radar when it came out I didn’t listen to it yet. Scraping The Divine is a collab between Full of Hell and Andrew Nolan, whose chaos squares Full of Hell’s.

    The industo-noise meets grind/powerviolence is perfect for dancing, walking, chilling out, etc. even though it does not at all come across that way from the start of a first listen—”Sphere of Saturn” featuring Justin K Broadrick (GODFLESH, jesu) is just so spacey shoegaze noise madness.

    This meeting of minds is one I would love to see more of in future. This creation is absolute bliss.

    written 2024 Dec 26

    Glassing

    From the Other Side of the Mirror

    “Circle Down”

    I shared several albums in a private group back in April without sharing them on Instagram because I didn’t listen to them fully yet.

    One album is From the Other Side of the Mirror by Glassing. The album went to the top of the list because of Matthew telling me that I *need* to listen to it, which I did need to, I really did. The sad melodies, heartache hardcore, drowning reverberating vocals, distant thrumming beat is completely coded to a combination of what I enjoy and love. Listening feels like words stuck in the throat—just let it take over.

    This album (even more than their previous ones) evokes a feeling I know well, a desperation to be heard and seen in ways that long ago should have happened and never did; being stuck and not found, crying out. And maybe I’m wrong, maybe that’s just what it evokes for me. The eerie and then hopeful interludes, the screams over melodies, the harsh softness of post-hardcore/black metal and sprinkling of doom all make for something that lets the light shine through.

    written 2024 Dec 25

    Mitochondrion

    VITRISEPTOME

    “The Cruxitome”

    Vitriseptome (2024 November 01) is Mitochondrion‘s first album in a long time and is absolutely brutal. It does not let up. I thought the tone would bring my mood lower though really listening was a wonderful way to dispel (de-spell). Mitochondrion has a way of being able to create a contant wall of sound and not misstep the force of that sound.

    This was a band that was first recommended to me years and years ago by an anonymous person on Reddit based on my love of Plebeian Grandstand, Ulcerate, and more.

    The blasting of Mitochondrion was perfect while grating potatoes for my kugel.

    written 2024 Dec 25

    Caligula’s Horse

    Charcoal Grace

    “Sails”

    Caligula’s Horse‘s Charcoal Grace (2024 January 26) songs often come off like lullabies (in the best way possible) which is where I think many people get Leprous similarities from, I see The Ocean and Haken as well.

    Their song “Sails”, for me, showcases the most burden of resiliencethat as a theme in Caligula’s Horse lyrics. “But all that land I thought I found, Was only water for the drowned” / “And all masks fell there on the shore, And all I’ve ever been is war” / “So never forget the ways we failed, On we sail”.

    Hope does not need to be saccharin nor does resilience need to be a burden and I believe Caligula’s Horse provides the beauty of this concept.

    written 2024 Dec 25

    PILLAR OF LIGHT

    Caldera

    “CERTAIN END”

    PILLAR OF LIGHT‘s first LP Caldera came out earlier this month (2024 December 06), they have been on my radar for a little bit. They are wonderfully melancholy sludge/doom metal.

    The vocals are gut-wrenching, truly the whole album is, which speaks to the grief expressed. The lead up to the line “thank you for loving me” in the last song “CERTAIN END” completely rips at the heart…it feels like the album leads to this moment, the slow movement of the songs at the start, the calm at the center, and the last two that quicken (and break apart). The end noise, vibrations overwhelm then it stops and yet still the sound of motion, utterly gorgeous.

    written 2024 Dec 24

    Cave Sermon

    Divine Laughter

    “The Paint of an Invader”

    My good friend suggested Cave Sermon to me back in January 2024. I didn’t start doing these music recs til February.

    Cave Sermon has elements that remind me of SUMAC, Blood Incantation, Tomb Mold, & Cult of Luna. There are times in listening to Divine Laughter where it feels like a dream, completely whimsical, and yet so brutal.

    written 2024 Dec 19

    Mercy Ties

    Reflections and Criticisms

    “Love All The People”

    I should be sharing more albums that come out this year and yet I can’t help myself and I’m sharing one that’s coming out my birthday month next year. Mercy Ties are *back* and have a pre-order for their upcoming album Reflections and Criticisms. “Love All the People” is <has done been?> streaming and it’s a don’t miss.

    With their new single you can still hear that hardcore punk sound, that’s just a little bit tighter, a little more cohesive, without losing that rawness. There’s this overlapping wave of melody near the end—just a hint in the background along with the distortions. Excited to hear more when this almost 2-minute song has drawn me in this well.

    Chris Common (A Storm of Light, These Arms Are Snakes) and Scott Evans (Kowloon Walled City, Plink) engineered and mixed.

    written 2024 Dec 18

    Choir

    Smithe Thee Smoldering Providence

    “And Sing an Anthem for the Famine II”

    Starting Choir‘s new album Smithe Thee Smoldering Providence (2024 December 17) is like finding shelter in the mountains. The wind is howling, whipping around, and maybe it feels a little damp from the rain that has just begun.

    Then the storm comes in like a battering ram, and it won’t let up…so going deeper and deeper into shelter / into the cavernous depths / seems better and better, and it quiets a little, but it’s still there and it’s inexcapable, yet soothing.

    Blackened tech death doom.

    written 2024 Dec 17

    This Gift Is A Curse

    Heir

    “Kingdom”

    These noisemakers will be back with a full album release just in time for Purim 2025. ifykyk—how fitting is the album and song title for this holiday.

    I gladly accept this offering 👐. This Gift Is A Curse released single “Kingdom” off their upcoming album Heir (2025 March 07). I have awaited this album and will accept any and all crumbs ̶f̶o̶r̶ ̶I̶ ̶a̶m̶ ̶a̶n̶ ̶u̶n̶h̶e̶a̶l̶t̶h̶y̶ ̶b̶i̶c̶h̶ ̶w̶h̶o̶ ̶l̶o̶v̶e̶s̶ ̶w̶h̶a̶t̶ ̶s̶h̶e̶ ̶l̶o̶v̶e̶s̶ from this beautiful black-sludge noise metal band.

    If you haven’t checked out their catalogue I highly recommend you do while you wait. The first track off their upcoming album is already tingly (anticipatory) inducing and incorporates that fast chaotic / smooth melodic combo that black-death metal often utilizes and This Gift Is A Curse has mastered.

    Very Haunted Horses vibes as well.

    written 2024 Dec 16

    UNIKNEIM

    C

    “Blest”

    UNIKNEIM is Chad Kapper (Frontierer, A Dark Orbit, When Knives Go Skyward), Lee Fisher (Fawn Limbs), and Dmitry Polyakov. Do not miss this noisy grind triad full of waking dreamlike lyrics. This beast released three days ago (2024 December 13) and it is an absolute brain massager. A relaxing assault of grind mechanics.

    written 2024 Dec 12

    Decline Of The I

    Wilhelm

    “L’ Alliance Des Rats”

    I think I found another favorite band? I’m not even sad (ok maybe a little sad) I haven’t heard of them sooner, just happy to have found them now and to have whole catalogue to play through. Decline Of The I have been around since 2006 and have a new album coming out in February 2025 with single L’Alliance Des Rats streaming now.

    I’m not surprised they’re about to be amongst favorites when they’re a philosophical avant-garde post-black metal band with melodic and raw depth. Super excited to see where they’ve taken this new album while I dig throughout their living past.

    Also the *imagery* on all their albums is top tier suiting to sound. Evoking so much of the ebb and flow, the constriction…the inescapable self vs what’s left, etc. etc.

    written 2024 Dec 09

    Lowen

    Do Not Go To War With The Demons Of Mazandaran

    “Najang Bah Divhayeh Mazandaran”

    This is the first album in a while where I first heard it in the car and thought “I have to get home and tell someone about this.” Partly because many of my friends are progressive metal lovers and only in the past few years have I incorporated more prog metal bands into my hardcore sludgey black/death metal heart.

    Lowen is self-described as progressive doom metal and inevitably incorporates other elements, such as the powerful use of fast drums at slow tempos (sometimes a very particular sound for me) which I hear so much in melodic black/death metal. This technique made me fall in love with Départe so easily mixed with the clean/melodic and harsh vocals which Lowen also employs.

    Does anyone remember the exact moment they got goosebumps listening to a band? I do with Départe and I do with Lowen. Their single off the new album was the first song I hears and the buildup started at 44 seconds in, then continued on past the 1-minute mark, 2:10…, then around 3:13 it finally solidified.

    Lowen is up there in technicality and the ability to switch into various spaces of a song as Between the Buried and Me. It’s difficult for me to think of another band that is able to do that cohesively and in quite that way.

    written 2024 Dec 09

    Void of Hope

    Proof Of Existence

    “Proof Of Existence”

    One of the lasts bands that I listened to recently is Void of Hope. They sound like ground (*coffee*) crust black metal with progressive and doom elements. Their self-titled single off upcoming album Proof Of Existence came out a few days ago. The dissonant harmony (how odd is our language) is a real draw for why I enjoy certain black metal bands and Void of Hope plays with dissonance in an utterly fun way.

    written 2024 Dec 07

    Mammoth Grinder

    Undying Spectral Resonance

    “Decrease The Peace”

    Mammoth Grinder‘s new EP Undying Spectral Resonance (2024 November 15) is heavy, like always, which brings a steadiness to their music even with new members. Elements of old school death metal, groove, and sludge metal make up Mammoth Grinder’s distinct brutal sound.

    I can see the resemblance to Gate Creeper, Entombed, & SUMAC in various capacities.

    written 2024 Dec 04

    Sunspoken

    Sky Sanctum

    “As The Stars Shiver”

    Sunspoken (Tomas Anton Docherty) put out a 2-song EP, Sky Sanctum that I happened to cross this morning and it is so gentle. This experimental, post-atmospheric rock/metal project has soft spoken conversational singing style overlapped with the melodic waves of instrumentation make for a gorgeous combination.

    Sunspoken is so well named, especially upon listening on my earlier than usual morning. It is the rays opening the curtains, the dust floating in the liminal space, and the creak of the floorboards.

    written 2024 Dec 01

    Suffocate for Fuck Sake

    Fyra

    “15 Missed Calls”

    Tuck yourselves in babes, this is a longer music recs.

    I have been a little music search gremlin since the age of 10 with a Windows 2000 via Live/DeadJournal, The Metal Archives when it came out, and more. I typically enjoy going straight from the “source” but there can be something special about sharing with a friend…

    Matthew shared Suffocate for Fuck Sake with me, a band I had inadvertently avoided all these years first by way of their name and then because I suppose I thought I already gave them a try.

    Suffocate for Fuck Sake reminds me a bit of listening to Cult of Luna for the first time, which makes sense because Matthew recommended them to me based off of my love of Cult of Luna, Der Weg Einer Freiheit, and others. Their sound, it’s basically all things of early post-hardcore—and so chaotic hardcore, more in the sense of transitions. Or rather, do they remind me of my friend Andrew…of Vast, who Andrew in my junior year of high school shared with me while parked on a dirt road late at night who was so nervous to share because I always shared with him—and he always, always listened and told me his thoughts. 

    This music is really intimate and raw. Those elements of that post-hardcore sound that was coming out…that truly slow and sweet, and kind of syrupy without crossing the Rubicon into emo. Then they have this kind of harder, harsher hardcore which makes sense in the soundscape of song and speech. 

    So, no, I stubbornly don’t typically take recommendations. Like I love finding music on my own, and at the same time I love to share music with people—to do a back and forth of it. It’s just, there’s something that feels so good about being able to discover something on your own. But then with this, with this,…I’m brought back to not only discovering one of my favorite bands [Cult of Luna], but also sharing a memory, almost…experiencing this memory of my friend Andrew who died so long ago, not the urgent phone calls, but us. I think he would have liked this band, I think we would still be sharing, exchanging our Walkman with Bluetooth headphones. And this is why, this is part of why I share how I do, my dad [Richard Straw] calls it, “heartfelt from the hip”.

  • 2024.11 November Music Recs

    written 2024 Nov 30

    M​ú​r

    M​ú​r

    “Vitrun”

    M​ú​r somehow evokes bands Cult of Luna, Gojira, Devin Townsend, Ulcerate, Meshuggah, Opeth, and more. M​ú​r’s self-titled debut album is likely one of the best if not the best debut from a band I have ever heard. M​ú​r is solid, their sound so well put together whilst still combining so many elements of post-metal, with atmospheric undertones. I gladly await to see more of this band and their journey. Many of their songs sound like landscapes, flowing like wind and fog. M​ú​r’s debut released 2024 November 22.

    written 2024 Nov 29

    Tonnen von Hall

    Ein Abdruck vom Messer im Herzen

    “Erdmantel”

    Tonnen von Hall is technical avant garde math metal, and although I don’t have as much experience listening to this particular kind of music I knew I wanted more the second I heard it. I feel like this is the kind of music people say is a musician’s musician/music and I say, please let me join in on the joy. Tonnen von Hall feels like falling into Oz or Wonderland. Ein Abdruck vom Messer im Herzen is out 2025 January 31.

    written 2024 Nov 27

    ASkySoBlack

    Touch Heaven

    “Boy Like a Bruise”

    As M./Doomseer from Bandcamp said, “This is the vibe”. Debut LP by ASkySoBlack deserves much love for it is indeed *mood*. With bedroom shoegaze style sound and lyrics, it captures the moment of clarity in chaos during an emotional breakdown (or is it breakthrough). Song “Carousel House” is the most laced with metal influence out of the three songs streaming now. All have post-hardcore melody with hints of mid-2000s. ASkySoBlack’s Touch Heaven out 2025 January 31 via New Reality Zine.

    written 2024 Nov 15

    Haunted Horses

    DWELLER

    “Grey Eminence”

    Spooky Ponies are back and I’m very excited for it. Haunted Horses released a single off their upcoming album DWELLER. So far the new keeps up with their industo-punk noise and hint of new wave. Never bought a pre-order so fast.

    written 2024 Nov 10

    Isleptonthemoon

    Only the Stars Know of My Misfortune

    “I Belong to the Void”

    Isleptonthemoon (blackgaze/post-black metal) is so calming, they are like a softer Holy Fawn who are calm and beautiful themselves. With lyrics like: “Hold still/ I’m breaking me down into smaller parts / So you can see all the little ways / I’m heading for an early grave“…”I have been followed by an ever-present void / And now each and every glimpse of light has been destroyed“…”Only the stars will know the pain I feel / I fell apart and blocked my own paths to heal” how can you not love Isleptonthemoon. Only the Stars Know of My Misfortune released 2024 November 08.

    written 2024 Nov 08

    PLOUGHSHARE

    Second Wound

    “Thorns Pressed Into His Head”

    The kind of music PLOUGHSHARE (black/death/doom) makes feels like a warm embrace (to me)…the won’t-let-up thrumming of each instrument and overlapping melodies is like a waltz rather than a funeral doom (dirge). Bands that make me feel this way in that genre or adjacent are Départe, Plebeian Grandstand, Der Weg einer Freiheit, Ulcerate, Norna, and more. Second Wound released today, 2024 November 08.

    written 2024 Nov 06

    Envy

    Eunoia

    “The Night and the Void”

    Envy continually makes solid albums, this is their eighth, and they have been around since 1992. I hadn’t listened their newest until yesterday. I was reminded of From Autumn to Ashes—another nostalgia band I guess—which goes to show how influential Envy has been for so many years. I love how texturally beautiful and calm this album is. Eunoia was out 2024 October 11.

    written 2024 Nov 06

    Lie After Lie

    4 Dni

    “Dzień 2”

    Lie After Lie was my morning listen today and much needed. “Melodic-hardcore-punk” fits well in describing them. There’s more sadness there than anger (which I’m drawn to). I think if you’re a Birds in Row fan you should give Life After Lie a listen. 4 Dni out 2024 November 07 via Arcadian Industry.

    written 2024 Nov 03

    Augurs of Eden

    Reverie in Half​-​Light

    “HOPE”

    I’ve been more introspective than even usual lately and this was a really nice find to help out or into that mindset. Augurs of Eden is super playful (and beautiful) grindcore. Love the snippets of interwoven styles of metal. Reverie in Half-Light came out 2024 October 31.

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